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Sunny side up

Image result for optimismMy New Year’s resolution for 2017 is to be more optimistic. I’ve always been a bit wary of optimism before: isn’t it just burying your head in the sand or putting on a pair of rose-tinted glasses? Now I’m beginning to understand – real optimism isn’t pretending things are perfect, it’s having the confidence that you can make things better.

This means believing in your potential, knowing that you can change. One day you will be a Buddha, for goodness sake, what is there to be pessimistic about?

Every living being has the potential to become a Buddha, someone who has completely purified his or her mind of all faults and limitations and has brought all good qualities to perfection. Our mind is like a cloudy sky, in essence clear and pure but overcast by the clouds of delusions. Just as the thickest clouds eventually disperse, so too even the heaviest delusions can be removed from our mind. Delusions such as hatred, greed, and ignorance are not an intrinsic part of the mind. If we apply the appropriate methods they can be completely eliminated, and we shall experience the supreme happiness of full enlightenment.

~ Eight Steps to Happiness

That’s from the introduction to Eight Steps; right from the very beginning, Geshe-la has been telling us this incredible truth. If we just had faith in these words, there would be no basis to ever be discouraged. As Shantideva says:

Having mounted the steed of bodhichitta
That dispels mental discouragement and physical weariness,
The Bodhisattva travels the path from joy to joy.
Knowing this, who could ever be discouraged?

We need to make a habit of relating to our potential rather than our present limitations. We are not confined by the self we normally see; this is just an illusion. Stop listening when that self insists on being ordinary: tell ourselves ‘I can be something better instead.’

Most importantly, optimism is a choice. We can actively decide to have faith in a better outcome; we don’t have to wait for the world to provide us with something to be optimistic about. We already have ample cause to be encouraged: this precious human life, a supreme Spiritual Guide, our Buddha nature just waiting to be discovered.

Confidence

Most of the tips you see on how to develop self-confidence recommend telling yourself how great you are and that you can achieve anything. I’m not so convinced – sometimes this will just be setting you up for disappointment. England will probably not win the European cup, however many fans tell themselves ‘we’re the best.’ If our confidence is based on the belief that we are better than someone else, then our bubble will be popped soon enough and we’ll end up discouraged. A more honest confidence comes out of recognizing the equality of self and others.

If we consider ourselves and others to be of equal importance, we level the playing field so there will never be a reason to think that our contribution to the world is less significant than anyone else’s. For example, if we’re in a meeting we can confidently express our opinion because we will feel that our view is just as valid as our colleagues’.

The confidence that is based on equalizing self and others also does not contradict being humble. I can’t remember who said this, but it’s a great quote:

“Humility is not thinking less of yourself; it’s thinking of yourself less.”

Humility grows out of an inner strength that values ourselves highly enough to be able to set our own agenda aside; we can take a back seat and give others the limelight because when we have authentic self-confidence we don’t need others’ recognition or approval.

More on this: Building Self-Confidence day course